Eh....limpeh always thought that only limpeh's friend read limpeh's blog. Today, limpeh sent limpeh's laobu to Tampines Giant to buy longan(the longan here good one...they let you pick whichever good longans you want and somemore let you take away the stalk so that it'd weigh lesser!) and while limpeh was walking towards limpeh's car to get something, someone actually approached limpeh and say he know limpeh!!


At first, limpeh thought limpeh kiam him $$ so he come and tell me owe $$ pay $$. But but but but but, limpeh very seldom borrow $$ one leh..then you know what he say? HE READS LIMPEH'S BLOG LEH!! AND HE THINKS LIMPEH quite FUNNY LEH!!! Ok lar, nothing to howlian about...you might wanna say "maybe he is the only reader apart from your friends.." Ya, you could be right, he might be the only one who reads limpeh's blog even though he doesn't know limpeh. Allow limpeh to show you something.


According to Singstat, Singapore's population based on Jun 2007 was 4.68million (http://www.singstat.gov.sg/stats/keyind.html#popnarea, Jun 07){<---my lecturer say everything you quote must show the origin else its known as plagirism or wateverfuck way you spell it...morever this site belongs to ah gong!} Lets do some probabiliy here...


Chances of meeting your 1 and only reader in Singapore = 1/4,680,000<--Singapore's population..and limpeh thought we should be well over 10 million with all the PRCs that found refuge here

Chances of meeting your 1 and only reader in Singapore's Tampines Giant = 1/4,680,000 * 1/2,000<-- estimated number of places where people go to in Singapore, including hawker centres, shopping centres, community centres....Community centres?

Chances of meeting your 1 and only reader in Singapore's Tampines Giant on New Year Day = 1/4,680,000 * 1/2,000 * 1/365<--limpeh wanna be more precise by typing 364¼ days but limpeh think no one bothers.

Chances of meeting your 1 and only reader in Singapore's Tampines Giant on New Year Day and he has the ball to come up and tell you he reads your blog = 1/4,680,000 * 1/2,000 * 1/365 * 1/20<--limpeh think only 20 guys out of 2,000,000 guys in Singapore have the balls to do that.


That adds up to 1 chance in 68,328,000,000,000.


Does that means limpeh gonna tio toto? 1 chance in 68.328 trillion chance limpeh oso can kanna leh!!!! You say limpeh heng or not?


Anyway, limpeh had to say, this does give limpeh the encouragement to keep on blogging. It shows people recognise limpeh's work and appreciate it. Thank you David, for making limpeh feel like blogging again.


But don't count on it too much....cos limpeh's target sales for 2008 is a staggering 20% increase and seriously, limpeh got no idea where that 20% is gonna pop up from. Maybe its time for limpeh to go MRT stations to distribute limpeh's namecard?

Question:

Why is it impossible to stop along Geylang Serai Road during Hari Raya period?




Answer:

Because you keep seeing GREEN light, thinking it is ok to go.

Hi fuggers...this picture was sent to limpeh by limpeh's veggie and limpeh thought its rather cute therefore limpeh is sharing with you...(break record leow..limpeh uses 4 limpehs in one sentence hahaha!!)


This cat is call Cookie and it belongs to who else but Catwoman

This is Catwoman giving her cheeky look, trying to seduce limpeh and buy her a $1k+ ragdoll...limpeh still wondering how can a doll made of rag, cost $1k+. I rather throw in another $3k to get alcon big brake kit haha..


Now lets talk about Cookie. Cookie is a longkang cat found in Ngee Ann Polytechnics by Catwoman. According to Catwoman, this cat was drowning when she found her. According to the rightfully owner, Aunty SaoTorKar, her cat (she call it Cream then) was having swimming lessons but was then abducted by alien and was never seen again. Cream was Aunty SaoTorKar only partner and she was devastated when she thought Cream was abducted by aliens from Uranus that she jumped from the highest storey of Media Resource (also known as MR by the BBS siao). Little did Aunty SaoTorKar know that Cream was actually saved (as Catwoman would like to think) and brought all the way back to Thomson. Cream was named Cookie ever since and live the life of a royalty. Eat good, sleep good, got garden to roam about, got competition to join and best of all, got bell to wear too!


Cookie did her part as a cat as well, catching all the pests and rodents for her owner, Catwoman. Just 2 weeks prior to this, Catwoman told limpeh that Cookie caught a green snake (that is wat Catwoman thought but limpeh think its just a big fat caterpillar trying to find a place to go thru metamorphosis but suay suay kanna caught by Cookie) and left it at her doorstep. This time, cookie caught wat she ought to be catching and left it in Catwoma's room, flaunting to Catwoman.



A haolian cat showing off her prize. I bet the rat is 20 years old and can't possibly outrun Cookie, thats why kanna caught.


Thats the end of this cute post. Although limpeh sound like limpeh see Cookie no up, limpeh actually love Cookie a lot, perhaps more than limpeh loving limbu. But due to the fact that limpeh is trying to act MAN, therefore limpeh cannot express it openly. This is a picture to prove limpeh's point..


Girl so pretty, boy so handsome right!!


Ok, its time for limpeh to go see customer and then sua to Yap Brothers to zng my JBT 4pots chromed big brake kit hahahaha!!

er...hi everybirdie!! its quite a surprise that limpeh still have so many loyal fans(actually its friends lar..) reading limpeh's blog. Becos limpeh really don't have much time to blog, though limpeh would very much want to, limpeh just dont have the fucking time.

Ok, thats a fucking lie. Limpeh wu eh see see gan(meaning limpeh what oso dont have, only have time). LANJIAO UNDERSTAND!! Pang sai oso dont have see gan leow, where got see gan sit infront of computer and dik diak dik diak type those wu ga bo eh...but but but...actually if want can type one, just that limpeh really bo sim cheng or cheng sin to do those editing or posting pics. If just type and type, limpeh doubt you buggers would keep coming back to read. Limpeh know some just wanna see pictures and chio. Chio chio chio, Chio ki lanz...what so ho chio?



For those who've not seen limpeh for a while, this pic is for u to remember how limpeh look like.


Actually, limpeh's life is pretty darn dull nowadays with little or no happenings. But still, limpeh would still take pictures when limpeh see something funny...




limpeh saw not one but four spidermen when limpeh went KL to eat Haagendaz leh! But unfortunately, that girl with these spidermen is not Kirsten Dunst. Wah lan eh...limpeh still cannot forget the part where Kirsten Dunst kiss spiderman when he was hanging upside down from a building..can see Kirsten Dunst's nehji leh!! You don't know what is nehji? Nehji is that thing that will harden when you feell cold. Still dunno what is it? Go Eskimo Bar, dont wear the jacket and see what turns hard first.


Ok ok, to peep more into limpeh's life nowadays, limpeh will now introduce my colleagues to you guys...not alot but some very interesting characters...



This is Uncle Tan, my warehouse cum delivery cum multi-purpose man. Legend says that this man is the famous meepokman from Kallang. To me, he is just an ordinary uncle who loves watching tv, reading newspaper and share his findings with others.



...and with him around, life is fulla surprises and laughters haha...



This is Alvin Tan. No, he is not uncle Tan's son. No, he is not limpeh's brother as well. Yes, he is just Alvin Tan. Ten years limpeh's junior, who loves fishing and anything to do with fishing. What the fuck was limpeh doing when limpeh was at his age? Busy cheonging Madamwong with francis and chow curly and seeing Ben bedding every fucking chick he can lay his hands on. Alvin fish from the pond, limpeh fish from the dancefloor


Ok, that'll be all for now. Limpeh still got a few more funny character in limpeh's company to intro so stay tuned. The next few colleagues are the people who can actually kill limpeh with the the things thay say.

Since limpeh is waiting for limpeh's colleague to gimme limpeh's DO, limpeh will blog a little.

Well, life been really tough recently because alot of people shit and expect limpeh to wipe their ass. Erm, actually, limpeh had to lick their fucking asses. Therefore, pardon limpeh for not having time to blog or watsoever. And to make things worse, limpeh got 2 group assignments yet to do. And to make things even worse, limpeh's 2 groupmates are more lum nua than jiaos. So limpeh don't really expect to get things done until limpeh decide to push them a little.

2 more weeks to attaining limpeh full licence! Say goodbye to that fucking ugly underwear limpeh have to display to show people limpeh just got licence and give way to limpeh. THEY DON'T!!! They don't really give a fug to whether you pass yesterday or the day before, they just cut into your lane without signalling because their signal light pai leow (don't buy Merz or BM cos their signal lights always pai one), jam brake in front of you because they wanna dry their brake pads after running thru a puddle of water, stick so close to your ass and expect you to give way to them cos they are rushing to find the nearest toilet to shit or simply forget where they place their accelerator pedal and expect you to get out of your car, knock on their windows and tell them that the extreme right pedal is the accelerator pedal and please step on it and move along because the traffic light won't be green forever. All the cheebyes on the road made limpeh more determine to join the ranks of being a cheebye. Why? Because if you can't beat the cheebyes, you join em and be a cheebye yourself.

Ok, enough of ranting. Limpeh found a new way to upload limpeh's pics to limpeh's laptop and it is easier than using bluetooth so here you are, pics taken quite sometime back...

The most pahlia teletubbie limpeh ever come across. But since its from Malaysia, you can't expect much.



Guess whose birthday cake? (Hint: What does that candle symbolises?)

Its easy to guess this ride belongs to who. Yes, you are right, it belongs to Rafi the void-deck wanderer.


Thats it for now. Its time for limpeh to deliver goods to forever demanding customers. But wadaya know? We are customers too!! So what goes around, comes around. Therefore, we must all be cheebyes and demand more from the vendors!! It is an evil cycle. Like it or not, this makes the world turn round and round..

Hey! Its not that limpeh've forgotten about your birthday...its just that limpeh can't think of any reason to just wish you Happy Birthday and then disappear for the rest of the year. So if you are still tuning into limpeh's blog, Happy Birthday to you ya?

Wah..so long never blog, limpeh don't even know how post picture here leow haha...

We celebrated jiaos birthday on last friday (don't know why we always celebrate his only) and it was quite a turnout except for the wife of the organizer. Becos the small one was sick, so the big one had to stay home and look after. Then another big one had to rush off after eating dinner, becos worried if the big one and small one are both ok. This, is the life that most will go thru in the next 5 years.

Not necessary for limpeh's case though. Hurhur...

And so, its again all talks and makan and drinking..but the feeling had somehow, changed. Dunno what have changed but just different. Maybe everyone is dua han now? Even sing birthday song in the public also appear to scare mata catch like that...all sing so soft. But ok la, come out talk cock talk cock eat crab find parking snatch parking drink kopi drink teh halia sing birthday song eat mantou smoke smoke tarek tarek oso quite shiok la. Not everytime can like that also..

Ok...limpeh need to sleep soon cos need to go Jurong Island tomorrow. Don't worry, don't have to wake up at 4am cos limpeh's surname is not Oon...hurhur..kidding kidding. Limpeh just placed an order on this. The question now is, with cap nicer or without?

15th of July, 5 more days to the submission of limpeh's 5000 words management research project, 3000 words journal for 4 subjects and another 2500 words Human Resource Management assignment in 10 more days. You should be guessing that limpeh is so busy sourcing for information and typing away in some library. Guess what, limpeh is in the middle of a cat show organized by this cat society call Feline Fanciers of Singapore. Courtesy of Miss Janice Wee, limpeh woke up 0630 hrs this morning to catch the rising sun. Is this the difference between singlehood and partnershiphood? Is this the kind of honour every single guy out there is craving for? Is this what Steven Lim was thinking about when he openly seek for marriage in his blog? HE MUST BE OUT OF HIS FREAKING MIND OR SIMPLY, HIS MIND IS WHAT HE SITS ON.

Who the hell wakes up 6.30am to see cats compete for titles that they have no idea or whatsoever for and the prize money can't even get limpeh 4 sets of NGK Iridium sparkplugs? Might as well sleep right? Afterall, Sunday means Sun-Sun-go-away-limpeh-will-see-you-again-on-Monday-to-Saturday no? It is to limpeh, god damnit! Especially when limpeh slept at 2am the night before. As the saying goes, the first step is always the hardest but you'll get used to it, although limpeh seriously hope that they will run out of ribbons to give to the cats since cats cant eat it or sleep on it and therefore, limpeh don't have to wake up so early to see cats beauty contest and get irritated with penguins rambling on and on while they shift their cats in. Ok lar, as long as the chick is happy, limpeh also anything one lar. Because in times to come, she will join limpeh's event too..which is making our way to Sepang to watch Formular 1 hurhur...watch ki lanz...ah 1 you know or not? Limpeh rather watch it on Star Sports than making a trip there.

Limpeh like cats but limpeh like limpeh bed more than cats, especially on Sunday when limpeh dont have to wake up early to squeeze the already so jam packed road with dumb motherfuckers who bought their cars without installing any signal bulb. Ok, now limpeh have to go take video of my daughter while a japanese botak guy jugde her. Till then fuggers..

Is limpeh really that busy that limpeh've got no time to blog at all? You are absolutely right!!! Or rather, limpeh don't have that heart to tok cock sing song here to entertain limpeh's loyal fans. After one long day at work, kanna fuck by customers for things that are not within limpeh's control and writing things that limpeh dont understand at all, do you think limpeh still have that simcheng to entertain you fuggers? OF COS HAVE!! But gimme some relac moment lar...cos all limpeh want to do now is to sit on limpeh's bed and look at the lizard crawling on the ceiling and wait for it to lose grip and fall down beside me. Moral of the story? Limpeh just dont feel like moving at all, get it?

EPL season 2006/07 has ended! Manure is the Champion and Chelski finished second best. Charlton, Sheffield United and Watford are relegated. Spurs finished 5th (mai siao siao ok!!) successively and gain an UEFA cup spot. Hope their luck is better this time, not meeting Sevilla or any strong teams in the Semi-Finals. The question now is...will Martin Jol sell Berbatov to Manure? Berbatov is fucking good ok!! (Though he is balding..) What he should do is sell away Defoe lar...Defoe tak boleh cekap lar abang...Wonder who is he gonna bring in this season...Best is bring in a playmaker lar...if got one steady playmaker then getting into Champions League got hope leow!! Kaka sounds good hurhur...

Anyway, the end of EPL is the beginning of limpeh's shitty school. YES! Limpeh's 3rd term started leow!! Cheebye...havent rest enough then must start visiting libraries again...mathafarkas...nevermind...after this term left 3 more terms then limpeh completed my 3 goals for year 2007 leow! Ho say man...after this can go Ireland find Robbie Keane to tak kiew leow man~ Anyone wanna come along?