30 June 2003

Itssssssssss a beautiful Monday because I'm all alone at home woooooooooohooooooooooooooooo~~~~ Fuck...I love to be alone....sometimes...
Though its a BEAUTIFUL song, you'll get bored listening to it repeatedly for a few months. Finally Leewee downloaded a totally new version of Flash and imported this remarkable song that you're listening to now. YES!!! ITS CREEP!!! YOU WANNA FUCKING CREEP UP ON ME FROM BEHIND YOU SILLY ASSES??? BRING IT ON MAN BRING IT ON!!! HHAHAAHHAHAHAAHAAHHAHA!!! God I'm so happy I've decided to dedicate this entry to my very sweet friend Miss Leewee. Lemme see, what can I do to show her my gratitude? Ahh yes! I will post a picture over here that will make her smile for awhile....





Hope you like it wee hehe...but dont count on it too much. Its a first and last I post pictures of dolls in my blog, ok? Just for you...


Oh ya...would you like to have some Jin Zhu as well??

29 June 2003

I've lost a blog....thanks blogger!!! THANKS A FUCKING LOT TO YALL DIPSHITS!!!!!!!!!! Ok I think I'll have to retype the whole god damn shit again due to some 404 error shit. Ah fuck man..this is so sickening. I'll just quickly go about it. I'm having hamsters now cos ah may went on to buy one more to replace the one that escape from Alcatraz but in the end that escapee came back and ah may's having an extra one so she gave it to me. KEWL! My mom love it and went on to buy a $40++ cage fer it. She bought the rest of the crap as well like beddings, food, bathing sand and a bathtub. Then she bought him a mate yesterday and those 2 can's stop fucking. And my mom try to cover my eyes when one's trying to mount the other. Can't stand her....Maybe she's trying to tell me I should close my eyes when I'm trying to mount my wife next time ya? Ok I'll do that next time...hope my wife won't think that its because she looks like crap. So thats all about it that has happened in the household. Some shit going thru between me and ah may and she's being indecisive about us. I'll leave everything to her not because I dont care but more like I know to pick myself up should I stumble and fall. Anyway I dunno what she wants and what can I do about it. I'll just be passive about it I guess...

Both Juno and Leewee ask me to play with this Free Makeover!!! and I did. Its pretty fun to see what you can turn yourself into. Well I think I've turn myself into some fat chick with pink hair....take a look....


A



B



Yeah baby~!!! Do you think I'll get hitched if I go down to zouk with this A look or B look???
Ok I've said something crude in IRC but I think its kinda funny....

[16:25] Saint-Kid> How do you deal with horny girlfriend ?
[16:25] anyone> never dealt with one before...usually they r the ones to deal with horny boyfriends..
[16:25] SasSy-GeR> so anyone tt means u the bf?
[16:26] anyone> no their ex bf
[16:26] anyone> they ask me how come i never demand sex from them
[16:26] anyone> i say "becos i have my playstation u dunce!"
[16:26] SasSy-GeR> wahaha
[16:26] SasSy-GeR> does tt mean they more demandin den u?
[16:26] anyone> i'm reluctant to tell u that the answer is yes
[16:27] * pebblegal @@ anyone
[16:27] anyone> yes pebblegal
[16:27] anyone> dont tell me u want to have sex with me as well
[16:27] anyone> my gf @@ me all the time
[16:27] pebblegal> dun wori
[16:28] anyone> but i just continue playing my playstation
[16:28] pebblegal> i dun wan to have that wif u
[16:28] anyone> i dont give a shit to their request
[16:28] anyone> and i wont give a shit to yours either
[16:28] anyone> but sometimes i do give a shit
[16:28] anyone> i gave them a carrot
[16:29] pebblegal> anyone why dun buy virbrator for em?
[16:29] anyone> becos i dont believe in spending money on gals
[16:29] pebblegal> wahaha
[16:29] anyone> the carrot i took is wat my mom bought for her bunny
[16:29] SasSy-GeR> anyone u spent food on dem?
[16:29] anyone> i ask em to eat themselves most of the time


Just for laughs....do not take it seriously...
Wow...new interface!! Blogger has a new interface leh mai siao siao....ok this interface is definitely much coolness than the previous one. Oh..did I use coolness? God damn..i'm so in!! Ok I know I'm beginning to sound like Miss Tricia *peace sign*. Anyway I've not been free to blog at all. Hmm...'not been free' sounds kinda lame. Ok I admit, I haven't been in the right mind to blog cos there's been alot of shits going on recently. Since now I've got no one to chat with and I'm feeling ridiculously bored, I've decided to blog abit about what have been going on recently.


The main event would be the shutdown of #Singapore20+, the place that have kept me entertained for like 6 years? God...its been that long already? Anyway I wanted to post my views in the channel forum but on second thoughts, I think I better do it here. One reason is because I've seen one really horrible entry and she's really making herself to look like a retard. Ok I admit I make grammar and spelling mistakes all the time too but this is way too much. Well, people makes mistakes all the time, I know, but at least make the effort to minimise the number of mistakes you made by previewing it lar. Wanna take a look how bad it is? Here it is..

Re: #Singapore20plus - The New Era (Score: 1)
by cookie on Jun 27, 2003 - 07:37 PM
(User info | Send a message)

whoever is reading this.. pls try to keep an open minded.

Skeet i am sure that u have put alot of efforts in the channel to make it popular n a gd place for chatter to enjoy in but i really dont c the point of deregister the channel. I am no body to u.. u dont have to reason out wif mi.. but can u really bare the consequences?u may not know what eventually will happen n i certainly hope this is NOT what u want.But things did happened, the channel was locked up n a new channel was setted up.

I have lost a place where i can chat up wif my friends, where i can enjoys the chat n new friendship can be found

I may not irc as long as u did.. but what make u think that a new channel will make any different? Will it be a better place to chat in? Will the new owner as fug up as [yahoo]? Will the new OP maintain the channel as sg20+? Will it be a be a channel that u always wish for?

I may not agree wif MOST things u say but sometimes u do make some sense out of mi. Just that i am so disspointed that the magic is gone 4ever due to your action. Every1 changes in 1 way or the other. n u r certainly not the skeet that used to be.

Whatever i type this is no longer important, what i hate most is, how irresponsible n selfish 1 can turn out to be. Oh well.. truth hurts, but i do learn some new things. Those will say dont do 1 things will be the the first 1 to do it. Never trust some1 cos that hurts too much when i am betrayed.


The trust that i thought u will help to maintain sg20+ to be a better place



And trust me, I didn't ammend anything in that post to make it look more inane, if its not dumb enough already. Hilarious? Now take a look at her replies....


Re: #Singapore20plus - The New Era (Score: 1)
by cookie on Jun 29, 2003 - 11:19 AM
(User info | Send a message)

Romz well maybe u did not find any friendship in irc.. that does not mean it never exis

Magic as the feeling , dude. U r well know for a fugup buaya yourself.. this is 1 reason y ppl think sg20+ is for pick up point for a55holes.

why did you turn off your pte msg chat <-- errm may i ask u..y should friend to friend chat base on pte? 2nd well.. partly cos of i sick n tired of entertain cheehong like u.. i can still chat wif friends in main


I'm really baffled by her reply but I just can't stop reading it. She makes me feel good about myself. She makes me feel like I'm Shakespeare. Want more?


Re: #Singapore20plus - The New Era (Score: 1)
by cookie on Jun 29, 2003 - 11:32 AM
(User info | Send a message)

hello .. maybe my english too poor u cant understand it. never i try my best to explain.. the only channel where most of my known chatters is gone due to some selfish acts.. hope this is good enough for u to understant it


I still can't comprehend that even though she claimed that she've already TRIED to put it in a simpler way. I can't stop posting her silly replies arghhhhhhh~~~ Somebody stop me!!!

Re: #Singapore20plus - The New Era (Score: 1)
by cookie on Jun 29, 2003 - 11:37 AM
(User info | Send a message)

Well.. i cant laff cos it is not funnie

really? can i request for micheal jackson "heal the world" the words in the song quite meaning too.

Just hope u r enjoys all those mass reply u r getting .. havoc that is unnecessary due to 1 selfish acts



By now I hope I've convinced you that she's a nincompoop. Period.


Her replies have taken up too much space in this entry, perhaps I'll do another entry.



20 June 2003

Everybody wants to rule the world~!! Yeah....thats right~! Every now and then you would come across people who are dying to have power, authority etc etc. Everybody wants to be on top of the world, everyone yearns to have total control of another. Well, what can I say? Humans just adore the feeling of being the Alpha male. Complicated stuffs, hard to understand. I don't know how the hell i got involve as well, maybe I've let down my guard. Oh well, its just a game a program a pastime. Nothing much in particular, just cannot fully understand the benefit you get from backstabbing. Heck, I guess its time to move on....

I wonder why the more you put effort into maintaining relationship, the more you're afraid of losing that person.You see, I kept thinking about that unconditioned love ever since my friend leewee told me about it. Ya and I personally feel that, the only unconditioned love I can come up with is motherly love. Its hard, very hard, when you kept giving and not asking for anything in return. Come on, face it, we are not saints. Ok you might say you never ask for any return in any sense but deep down inside you, there's this little desire slowly brewing. We shall call it Hope. This Hope to have reciprocate care and concern is growing each day. You don't get what you want today, you'll pin your Hope on tomorrow, and its growing. As days go by, this Hope grew in volume. Slowly you are sick of not getting the kinda response you are hoping to get. You became frustrated. You've long forgotten about that unconditioned love you were talking about sometimes back. You start to demand the kinda things you think you deserve to have. And when your demand's turned down, you accused the other party for not putting in effort to maintain the relationship. Little did you realise, he/she did not demand anything from you in the first place, its all about you. You made the decision to do this and that for the other half, never did he/she demand you to do this and that. So why are you demanding things now? Wheres your so call unconditioned love now? Ok, so you'll say its not totally your fault, since you're just trying to make things work. Fine, thats sweet of you for being so thoughtful and considerate. But please oh please, don't talk about giving unconditioned love anymore, cause there's nothing thats unconditioned in the first place. So you thought, since thats the case, why not you be the reciprocating party? Then when you try doing that, the other half will start to think you've changed. Then its hard for you to explain things since its not nice to say "its all because you didn't reciprocate to what I've done for you so I don't see the point of doing nice things for you anymore". Things are just gonna turn ugly if you would say that. Anyway thats not really the case. You think it would be better if you were to be the responsive one cause things will be more balance then. The equation would work out as something like this....

Equation A
You do things for him/her willingly - he/she never do things back for you = Grouchy you.

So if that result is not desirable, why not.....

Equation B
You wait for him/her to do something nice for you + You does something nice in return = Happy making out!

But there's an unknown element in Equation B that might backfire. Whats that unknown element? It is....you wont know when he/she's gonna do that nice thing for you hahahaahhahahahhahaha.....so if he/she's not gonna do anything nice for you and he/she's waiting for you to do something nice to him/her, its gonna render Equation B null and void. So it all boils down to whether you are game enough to take the risk, and to seriously think about whether this thing's gonna work out fine if you seems to be the only one throwing in efforts. But please bear that in mind, unconditioned love only flow in the same blood. Either that or you might find your partner to be The Pope or Mother Teresa....


19 June 2003

Alright baby!!!! I'm back in action!!! My laptop's finally back and it like totally brand new hahahhaa....Ya, my brother asked his friend to help me fix the damn com and he actually took the effort to clean it up. The laptop look like its been to the shithole and back before my brother send to his friend for repair. Alright man!!! I miss its soft keyboard and brilliant internal speakers hehehe...so nice when you reappreciate things that you own. '

I'm like so busy restoring its past beauty that I forgotten to take my breakfast. By the time my mom nagged at me for the 2334341253245 time, its already past high tea time. Nevertheless my breakfast still taste, well, tastable hehe....When you're happy, it doesn't matter wat goes into your mouth, it'll just taste nice. Anyway I had an informal meeting with my lawyer and he suggested I go see a shrink. He's worried that I might be suffering from some post accident trauma, and it'd be best if someone were to assess my condition. He asked if I've been crying to myself, feeling depressed, frustrated with everything etc etc. Well, I do feel like crying at times but nah, I didnt actually cry. And the last time I ever felt like crying is many many months back, when everything looks kinda misty. I've been frustrated so often that I've lost count. Every now and then I'll get mood swings...I wonder those close to me ever felt those moments? Anyway my family is kinda conservative and I find it hard to tell them all these things. They would go "dont anyhow imagine things...you are fine" or "come on be strong now, dont be like a small kid". Ya I can relate to that, they just want the best for me and those were words of encouragement instead of trying to put you down with it. But its the reason why I dont feel like telling them whats in my mind too. Life is so confusing...you know who are the people that care but you just can't bring yourself to tell them your problems. Why? Because you care too. You don't want them to worry about you, but sometimes you just think they care too much till they don't wanna try understanding your situations. To them, seeing a shrink is like you are on the verge of going cuckoo. And chinese are very against these ideas. They though by not talking about it, the problem won't arise. Ok lar, I don't think I am going bonkers but sometimes I do feel like talking to someone who would just try to listen to me talking. When the lawyer said to me, "Lloyd, you can't make people understand what you're going thru because they are not you. No one will understand what you are going thru except you. And my job here is to get back what you deserve, and you have to tell me and/or the shrink what you are going thru all these while. Keeping mum won't get you anywhere." Oh man, for that moment I feel like he's so much better than those who kept telling me they understand how I feel and know what I am going thru. I'm so disgusted with this kinda formality. Maybe lawyers are trained in this aspect. They know how to talk and open you up. Anyway he say he's gonna book me an appointment with the shrink and I'm actually looking forward to it. Someone who will just listen to you and not try to understand how you feel and what you are going thru cos you will never never know how it is like, until you went thru it yourself. Maybe he will try to analyze you later on but at least he listen to you but he's not eager to make any comments or remarks. But still, kudos to those who stood by me all this while...

13 June 2003

Ladiez and Gentlemenz~ This is Mambo Number Five~ One two three four five, everybody see I'm stuck at home again on a Friday night! Yeah baby yeah~ This world wont stop spinning just because of you, you freaking twerp. Everyone's out having fun, who will care about this dude in this fucking thing with 4 fucking wheels which you don't call a car? Ok lar...not everytime I'm stuck at home on a friday night but ITS LIKE ALMOST EVERY FUCKING FRIDAY!!! Ok...I'm cool...no problem...I've feel like this for how many times already? YA ITS ALOT OF FUCKING TIMES LEOW GOD DAMNIT!!!!! Ok, I'll chill, nothing serious...just feeling a little bit bored I guess....WHAT A LITTLE BIT??????? ITS A FUCKING WHOLE LOT OF BOREDOM I AM BREWING HERE YOU FREAKING MORONIC NINCOMPOOPS!!!! Oh I'm so sorry I kept using profanities...A thousand apologies ok? Ok...thats good..You accept my apologies....AND WHO SAID I NEED YOUR SYMPATHY? WHO NEEDS YOUR "oh I'm sorry but I can't do much about it" SHIT?!?!!?!?!? GET YOUR SHIT AWAY FROM ME AND EAT IT WITH SOME PEANUT BUTTER SANDWICHES YOU DOLTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hooligan Bear
Hooligan Bear


Which Dysfunctional Care Bear Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

11 June 2003

Ok my laptop is officially dead.And I mean DEAD. I format it and then i realise my cdrom's rosak. So I cant get shits installed....I'm using my bro's com now and its really shit. Everything is shit...the com is slow the keyboard is noisy and the worst thing is...I'M NOT ALLOWED TO DOWNLOAD STUFFS INTO HIS COM!!!! Ok..guess I'll have to live with that since I'm at his mercy...Ok enough of rant, let me show you guys something to laugh about. I was in #nokia trying to sell my friend's phone. Then to my surprise, you dont only get people selling phone stuffs inside. People are virtually selling anything they want to sell. Hamsters, even scorpions! So I though of something cheeky and I went on to sell something like this...

[18:28] anyone> selling cow's testicle liquor!!!! revive ur man's vitality!!!!!!! enlarge ur member to an unbelieving size!!! Have you watch Anaconda yet? Arnold Schwarzenegger's wife saw and shout, "oh my god!! is that a kim zua?!?!?" David Gan's wife shout, "oh my goodness, why did you bring that elephant trunk home?" Whoops....ok...he aint got a wife that David Gan...its his hubby shouting that nite...

then leewee and juno gave more testimonies....

[18:24] portis> 'ever since my husband started usin it, i cant bear to stop fuckin'
[18:24] scarlet> "I drank it and my member immediately gave powerful results! My wife never sleep early anymore."
[18:24] portis> 'i was in awe, my penis grew 3 more inches after the first 2 weeks, it'samazing!!!'

Hahahahaha....I think this is funny stuffs...don't you guys think so too?

09 June 2003

I was feeling damn lousy last weekend cos I didn't get to go out and puff like a chimney. So I went into IRC and Juno caught me wandering aimlessly. We strike off a conversation quickly as usual but its kinda different from well, the usual. Well, this time I typed like non-stop and I think she barely have time to slot in a line or two. I was thinking of cutting and pasting the dialogue out here but its pretty long and I'm kind of lazy to do just that now. Sometimes I'll just feel like typing non-stop about almost anything I can think of. I dunno why, but I seems to be enjoying when I do that at times. Sometimes I would type out the lyrics of a song despite people keep asking me to stop and shut the hell up. I just dont care. I would just go on and on like it certainly feels ecstatic! Really awesome feeling to have...just like feeling melancholy at times. Sometimes when someone or something interuppts me I would lost that interest all of a sudden, like now....Suddenly just dont feel like typing anymore. Is this what you call mood swings? Beats me...perhaps I'll continue next time or what...meanwhile lemme show u what I hate to answer most in IRC...

[23:05] murasaki> u wrking nw?
[23:06] anyone> asking me?
[23:06] murasaki> yah
[23:07] anyone> ya working...selling cuttlefish in various KTVs at duxton road...
[23:07] murasaki> .....

Something's definitely wrong with her 'O' key....
Singaporean cannot be ORR LOH, stuffs that belongs to Singaporean cannot be ORR LOH as well. Just when I was singing praises for my CDROM, it died on me next day. Some software conflict I believe. Managed to burn something for Colin

just before it die. Ya....Matrix Reloaded OST. You're lucky dude....Anyway I think this piece of shit(my com, not Colin dude) needs to be taught a lesson yet again....I'll make sure he learn his lesson well this time. I'll give him the most formiable weapon ever invented for him, The Quickening! Whoops...I mean Formatting. If he's still giving me problem this time, I'll make sure I dump it down straight from...well...we'll decide about how high I should dump him from later on...

I've been wanting to edit these pics and have them uploaded quite sometimes back but I don't know why I didn't do it. Anyway it's been done and I'll have them post up now. By the way I'm finally going for my reviews tomorrow at TTSH, 7 months after my last operation. So guys, wish me luck or you might have to put up with my nonsense for a longer period. Meanwhile, enjoy the pictures....














































07 June 2003

Just reformat mah comp and God bless the fellar who invented CDs and Writable CDROM. Imagine you have to back up 10+ gigabytes of stuffs onto 1.44 floppy disk!! I wonder how many you need...oh my gosh! 10,000 copies!!!! Picture that people picture that!! Anyway its hard to link passe stuffs with the technology today...Man, just imagine 10 years ago 100 megabytes HDD is such a big deal...Today 100 megabytes is only enough for you to maybe store one single dance track. Anyway thats beside the point of this entry...it has nothing to do with what I have to write later on, or maybe it does....

Ever wonder whats the worst feeling to have? Anxiety perhaps...that guessing feeling...guessing what the others are thinking...guessing what the others want and dont want. I hate to guess, but sometimes its best if you pretend you dont know. But then again, that feeling sucks because you really really want to know. Life's an irony huh? Ya...damn it. Nate told me he read an article of a chap going to his friend's wedding when he just got divorced recently. Looking at other people's happiness when you're immerse in your own sorrows. Life's an irony huh? Ya...damn it. You think that money is so evil at times, but most of the time you just wish it wont stop rolling in. Life's an irony huh? Ya...damn it. I have this friend who have another friend whom my friend can safely say dat she have a much better character than her friend.. and probably look better(Confused?). Just dat my friend dun sleep around. Her friend, on the other hand, keep changing boyfriends all the time and there's this dork getting an MX5 for my friend's friend. I mean..my friend's trying to lead a life all by herself.. on her own...its damn tough but she's trying to get use to it and her conscience is clear..and her friend, on the contrary.. manipulates guys using sex. Sure you can say my friend can do the same thing as her friend then she can quit whinning and such. But cant she even whine? I whine too, almost all the time. I bet you whine too, maybe not to others but to the trees or dogs or cats or cockroaches. We all whine sometimes but we like to tell people off when they whine. Life's an irony huh? Ya...damn it. When you are staying with your folks you just cant stand the nags and restrictions. When they leave you forever you think of them all the time, and all the nags and restrictions suddenly become a joy to the ears. Life's an irony huh? Ya....damn it. You think that life's such a drag, but you just cant find that single bit of courage to end it. And when people found the courage to end it, they are deem as losers, deserters, failures etc etc. What an irony god damnit!!! You think its easy to end life? You think ending life will solve all the problems? You are just shifting the problems to the people close to you. You think if you dont die your problems will be solved? Oh my good lord....I'm contradicting myself already....I can no longer differentiate whats right and whats wrong....